Dirty Jokes
Cheeky adult jokes for grown-ups only. Rude, naughty and not safe for work.
456 jokes · page 6 of 10
- A woman visited an Amazonian tribe on a research tripA woman visited an Amazonian tribe on a research trip. She spent several days taking notes on the lifestyle and habits of the tribe and…
- The couple decided to hire a proxy father to have a babyAfter Mrs. Jacobs found out her husband was sterile, the couple decided to hire a proxy father to start their family. On the day the proxy…
- Authorities are warning people of a new scam being perpetrated at local mallsLatest scam warning. Authorities are warning people of a new scam being perpetrated at various mall and supermarket car parks. When the…
- George wanted to last longer during sex, so he went to see a doctor.George wanted to last longer during sex, so he went to see a doctor for advice. The doctor said that masturbating before sex often helps…
- Girl rips off her clothes and says take what you wantTwo engineering students ran into each other when going across campus. One of them noticed that the other one was riding a brand new…
- Girl taunts old man and asks if he ever did anything wildMe and my 67 year old dad were riding the bus heading downtown to go to the movies, when a young punk got on. She had spiked, multi-colored…
- A Guy Orders A Weight-Loss PlanA guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 5lbs weight loss program. The next day, there’s a knock on the door and there stands before…
- She made a dirty proposition to the masked man who readily agreed to her advancesOnce upon a Halloween night, a couple received an invitation to a masked fancy dress party. Unfortunately, the wife developed a terrible…
- Handsome cowboy claims the 21 year old girl isn’t wearing pantiesA tall and handsome cowboy walks into a bar. As he looks the place over, he notices a very attractive woman sitting by the bar, and without…
- He always wanted a pair of authentic cowbow boots…An elderly couple, Betty and Harold, moved to Texas. 🏜️ Harold always wanted a pair of authentic cowboy boots, so when he saw some on…
- He asked his date if she wanted to stop at a motel…On their first date, a man asked his companion if she’d like a drink with dinner. 🍷 She replied, “Oh, no, what would I tell my Sunday…
- He can't stop thinking about sex so goes to a Psychologist…The man goes to a Psychologist and says, "Doc, I’ve got a real problem, I can’t stop thinking about sex." 😩 The Psychologist replies…
Advertisement
- He notices a gorgeous woman sitting at a table nearby all aloneA man enters his favorite ritzy restaurant, and while sitting at his regular table he notices a gorgeous woman sitting at a table nearby…
- He said that I have a beautiful chassisOne evening, a beautiful 17 year old daughter came home, feeling slightly worried. Her dad noticed that something was wrong, and repeatedly…
- He slips both of his hands under her blouse and…A woman decides to have a facelift for her 50th birthday. 🎉💄 She spends £15,000 and looks sensational. 😍💷 On her way home, she stops at…
- He thought his wife was cheating on himA businessman had just landed in a different city for a conference and decided to check in with his family. He dials his home number and is…
- He was watching his dad's 'adult movies' when this happened…A woman pregnant with triplets had a hunting accident with a pumpgun. 💥 She was rushed to surgery, but 3 of the buckshot shards could not…
- Her bosom had a mind of it's ownIn a quaint little church, there was a talented organist named Karen, renowned for her impressive musical skills and, well, equally…
- Her Grandma was concerned about her date with a young manGrandma is seeing that her grandchild, a young woman, is getting ready to go out, dressing up nicely and being all nervous. So she asked…
- A lady called her gynecologist and asked for an emergency appointmentA lady called her gynecologist, and asked for an emergency appointment. The receptionist said to come straight in. She rushed to the office…
- Hilarious Ranch Neighbor Introduction, only in Texas!A feller buys himself a big ol' 200-acre ranch out in the country. One day, not long after he settles in, he's just kickin' back on his…
- Hilarious Three-Tasks Showdown for Cash at the BarA guy strolls into a bar and spots a glass jar brimming with cash on the counter. Intrigued, he decides to inquire about it with the…
- His boss suggests something naughty to recover from his illness…On a gloomy Monday morning, a fellow rings up his boss and tells him, "I'm terribly sorry, boss, but I'm down with something awful. I fear…
- His fiancee’s 19 year old sister tries to have sex with himJacob and Jessica had been dating for over a year, and so they decided to get married. They loved each other dearly, and everything was on…
- His friend was doing raunchy things in his dirty dreamsThe doctor said, “Beginning tonight when you’re dreaming, stop in Tulsa and I’ll drive the rest of the way to Chicago.” It worked…
- His Girlfriend Insisted They Were Being Spied OnA man and his girlfriend check into a hotel. “I don’t know why, but I’m afraid that this room might be bugged with listening devices.” the…
- His girlfriend was shocked that he sent her these!A young man wanted to buy a pair of expensive gloves for his sweetheart’s birthday. He went to an expensive boutique, bought the finest…
- His wife teased him – but he had the final wordMy wife and I went to the auction in Paris Kentucky the other week and one of the first exhibits we stopped at was the breeding bulls. We…
- The all-to-honest diagnostic computerOne day, in line at the company cafeteria, Jack says to Mike behind him, “My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I better see a doctor.”…
- How the Juggler Keeps His Balls in the Air!🎪 A woman buys a circus and makes herself the RINGMISTRESS. 🎩✨ In order to break the ice with her circus talent, she decides to talk with…
- "Father, I must confess, I came perilously close to committing adultery with another woman."A troubled married man entered the confessional and faced his priest with a heavy heart. "Father, I must confess, I came perilously close…
- The Husband Is Enjoying The After-LifeTheir biggest fear was that there was no after life at all. After a long life together, the husband was the first to die. True to his word…
- A woman could never get her husband to do anything around the houseA woman could never get her husband to do anything around the house. He would come home from work, sit in front of the TV, eat dinner, and…
- I am Pierre, the fighter pilot! When I have red meat, I have red wine!Pierre, a brave French fighter pilot, takes his girlfriend, Marie, out for a pleasant little picnic by the River Seine. It's a beautiful…
- I bet I can make love to you so tenderly that you won’t…67-year-old Mickey was at the bar, sipping his drink 🍺, when he noticed the young and sexy barmaid 😏. Mickey slapped a ten-dollar bill 💵…
- "I have a confession to make. I’m not a virgin"…On the first night of their honeymoon, the new bride tells her husband, “I have a confession to make. 😬 I’m not a virgin. I’ve been with…
- I met a gorgeous older lady at a party and she invited me home…During a soirée at this classy cocktail joint, I spotted this absolutely ravishing woman, far advanced in her years. 🌟🍸 Let me tell you…
- I remember the first time I had sex…I'll never forget the first time I had sex with a girl. There weren't a lot of options so we ended up doing it in my parent's bedroom. My…
- I was travelling around the orient and found this old oil lampThis guy pulled up to the bar in a brand new Cadillac. He gets out, walks inside, pulls out a rolls of twenties and starts buying everybody…
- I’ll open this croc’s mouth and place my manhood inside…An Australian drover walks into a bar with a 🐊 pet crocodile under his arm. He puts the croc up on the bar and says, “I’ll make you all a…
- Irish daughter had not been home for over 5 years.Irish daughter had not been home for over 5 years. Upon her return her Father cursed her heavily.
- It was AD 1095 and all the good knights were leaving for the CrusadesIt was AD 1095 and all the good knights were leaving for the Crusades. One knight told his best friend, “My bride is without doubt one of…
- Jack And Margaret Have Marital ProblemsJack and his wife Margaret both felt uninspired in the bedroom, and hadn’t had sex for a month. To get a change of pace and some fresh…
- A handsome man and a gorgeous woman met in a bar, and went back to her placeA handsome man and a gorgeous woman met in a bar. They got along pretty well and were extremely attracted to each other, so they decided to…
- The policeman noticed the elder lady dropping moneyA little old lady was walking down the street dragging two large plastic garbage bags behind her. One of the bags was ripped and every once…
- She has the breasts of a prom queen!Beaming with delight, the wife says, “Oh my love, better than that! The doctor just told me that for a lady who's knocked on the door of…
- "Take a glass of vodka up with you, and every time you start to feel nervous, take a sip."A nervous young priest is preparing for his first sermon. He goes to the elder bishop for advice, who tells him, "Take a glass of vodka up…
- The two prostitutes were actually very smartTwo prostitutes were riding around town with a sign on top of their car which said: "Two Prostitutes — $50.00." A policeman, seeing the…
- A blonde woman goes home from the bar with a bodybuilderA young blonde woman at a bar struck up a conversation with a muscular bodybuilder. After some flirtatious banter, they decided to head to…
- Three officers discuss intimacyA bunch of high-ranking officers were gathered, musing over the effort-to-pleasure ratio of intimate encounters. The young lieutenant…