Dirty Jokes
Cheeky adult jokes for grown-ups only. Rude, naughty and not safe for work.
102 jokes · page 1 of 3
- Three nuns find naked construction worker in the showerBeing able to think on your feet is a valuable skill, and will help you come up with solutions on the fly.
- 63 year old man can’t bring his 21 year old wife to orgasmWhen you get stuck trying to solve a problem, then getting advice from someone else can be a huge help.
- 67 year old man orders 10 steaks for his cat – his reason why is pricelessA 67 year old man walks into a restaurant, carrying a cat under his arm.
- An 85 Year Old Man Goes To The DoctorAn 85-year-old man was requested by his doctor for a sperm count as part of his physical exam.
- A blind man has a funny way of ordering his foodA blind man went to a restaurant.
- A college professor reminds her class of the next day's final examA college professor reminds her class of the next day's final exam saying…
- A farmhand moves to a new and modern farmSo this farmhand from a very small and remote town…
- A Girl Stows-Away On A ShipA depressed young woman was so morbid about life, that she was sitting on the jetty weeping…
- A guy, a pig, and a dog are the only survivors of a terrible shipwreckA guy, a pig, and a dog are the only survivors of a terrible shipwreck, and they find themselves stranded on a desert island.
- A guy and his girlfriend are in the shower together when the doorbell ringsA guy and his girlfriend are in the shower together when the doorbell rings.
- A guy asks his girlfriend for a dirty favorOne night after a date, a guy takes his 19 year old girlfriend home.
- A guy walks into a bar and orders a rum and coke, but the bartender hands him an appleA guy walks into a bar and orders a rum and coke, but the bartender hands him an apple.
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- A lady talks to her priest about her two vulgar parrots, his solution is pricelessA lady goes to her parish priest one day and tells him,
- A man and his wife go to a spiritual healer and they ask him to cure their illnessesA man and his wife go to a spiritual healer and they ask him to cure their illnesses.
- A man confesses his "sins" to his priestA priest is sitting inside the church, when a guy comes in and asks to be confessed.
- A Man gets on a bus and sits next to a mother with childA Man gets on a bus and sits next to a mother with child.
- A man goes into his favorite bar and sees a jar of money on the counter with the word "win" printed on itA man goes into his favorite bar and sees a jar of money on the counter with the word "win" printed on it.
- A man wearing a ski mask and carrying a gun bursts through the door of a BankA man wearing a ski mask and carrying a gun bursts through the door of a Bank.
- A middle-aged college professor receives a knock on the door of his office on campusA middle-aged college professor receives a knock on the door of his office on campus.
- A Russian, an American, and an Irishman are in a bar, drinking and braggingA Russian, an American, and an Irishman are in a bar, drinking and bragging.
- A small church had a very attractive big-busted organistA small church had a very attractive big-busted organist named Karen.
- A woman is hired at The Tickle Me Elmo factoryThere is a factory that makes the Tickle Me Elmo toys.
- Grandma explains to her grandson that the TV is her boyfriendA 5-year old boy went to visit his grandmother one day.
- The Cunning Old ManA balding, white haired man walked into a jewelry store this past Friday evening with a beautiful much younger gal at his side.
- Three friends had a very good friend named Greg and he was, naturally, an eternal optimistThree friends had a very good friend named Greg and he was, naturally, an eternal optimist.
- An attractive woman is sitting alone at the barAn attractive woman is sitting alone at the bar and sees a man with a military-style haircut sitting by himself at the other end, nursing hi…
- An elderly husband and wife go to the Doctor – his problem is quite unusualAn elderly husband and wife go to the Doctor.
- An Italian guy, a real Casanova, is out picking up women in RomeAn Italian guy, a real Casanova, is out picking up women in Rome.
- An Aussie Man Takes A Crocodile To A Bar – And Makes A BetAn Australian drover walks into a bar with a pet crocodile under his arm.
- Barnaby Joins A Nudist ColonyBarnaby joins a very exclusive nudist colony.
- Bishop gets furious when paper writes about his nunThere was a talent show in town, and a nun decided to compete with her trained circus cat.
- Bobby's secret seemed so easy, until…One weekend, a husband is in the bathroom shaving…
- A Cheating Father’s Kid Explains How Politics WorksA little boy asks his dad to explain politics.
- If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter I will inflict upon you the three worst Chinese tortures known to manA young man was wandering, lost in a forest, when he came upon a small house.
- Curious old man joins a nudist clubA curious old man joins a nudist club.
- A woman and her boyfriend are out having a few drinksA woman and her boyfriend are out having a few drinks.
- The waitress notices a man sliding under a tableA man and a woman are having dinner in a restaurant.
- A biker pulls up outside a roadside bar in LouisianaA biker pulls up outside a roadside bar in Louisiana after a long day in the saddle.
- A woman hasn't had sex with her husband in years, so he takes her to the doctorA woman hasn't had sex with her husband in years, so he takes her to the doctor.
- The nuns were harassed by a bunch of drunksA car full of Irish nuns is sitting at a traffic light in downtown Dublin.
- Zoo makes a proposition to a workerThe Melbourne Zoo acquired a female of a very rare species of gorilla.
- King Arthur is preparing to leave Camelot on a lengthy quest, but news has reached his ears that his wife may have taken on a loverKing Arthur is preparing to leave Camelot on a lengthy quest…
- Dorothy and Edna, two elderly widows, are talkingDorothy and Edna, two elderly widows, are talking.
- Dress of loveA mother-in-law stopped by unexpectedly the recently married couple's house.
- Eddie wanted to have his way with this really cute office girlEddie desperately wanted to have sex with this really cute, really hot girl in his office…
- A woman visited an Amazonian tribe on a research tripA woman visited an Amazonian tribe on a research trip.
- George wanted to last longer during sex, so he went to see a doctor.George wanted to last longer during sex, so he went to see a doctor for advice.
- A Guy Orders A Weight-Loss PlanA guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 5lbs weight loss program.
- He notices a gorgeous woman sitting at a table nearby all aloneA man enters his favorite ritzy restaurant, and while sitting at his regular table…
- Her Grandma was concerned about her date with a young manGrandma is seeing that her grandchild, a young woman, is getting ready to go out, dressing up nicely and being all nervous.