Clean Jokes
Family-friendly clean jokes you can share at work, at school or around the dinner table.
320 jokes · page 5 of 7
- The economy is so bad that this happenedTHE ECONOMY IS SO BAD THAT…
- A man and his wife are sound asleep in bed when the phone ringsA man and his wife are sound asleep in bed when the phone rings.
- Which side to park the CarJoe and Joan were sitting down to their usual morning cup of coffee listening to the weather report on the radio.
- Late one night a man is driving down the road, speeding quite a bitLate one night a man is driving down the road, speeding quite a bit.
- St Peter realizes that an engineer accidentally landed up in hellSt. Peter conducts a census in heaven and realizes someone is missing.
- In World War I there was trench warfare, and neither the Americans nor the Germans could get the upper handIn World War I there was trench warfare, and neither the Americans nor the Germans could get the upper hand.
- State Trooper pulls over 5 old ladiesSitting on the side of the highway waiting to catch speeding drivers…
- The Story Of The Missing PenguinsA man is driving down the highway…
- The bar offered $1,000 to anyone who could beat the bartenderA local bar was so sure that its bartender was the strongest man around that they offered a standing $1,000 bet.
- Surgeon explains why it’s so easy to operate on politiciansFour surgeons were sitting around on lunch break, discussing what kinds of people they like to operate on.
- Tactless sergeant has to deliver the shocking newsIt can be hard being diplomatic all the time. It’s a skill like any other – a skill that some people lack.
- Taxi driver describes the perfect manA man walks out to the street and catches a taxi just going by.
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- Texan tries eating bull testiclesWhen in Rome, do as the Romans do.
- The atheist couldn't believe it when the Priest and Rabbi did thisSo there is a Priest, a Rabbi, and an Atheist in a boat fishing.
- The burglar did not expect this to happenA burglar breaks into a house that is completely dark.
- The burglar is shocked when he hears a voiceA robber breaks into a house while the residents are away one dark night.
- The butler was trembling as she told him to take off her blouseThere was a butler named James who worked for an old decrepit Billionaire that had a smoking hot 25 year old wife.
- The captain announces that an engine has failedA jet is flying from Texas to New York when the passengers began to feel shaking.
- The City Council Workers Were A Bit… Odd.There were two guys working for the city council.
- The coach explains to the young lad about how to actA coach is looking after a young ice hockey team.
- The Colonel posed the question of just how much of sex was "work" and how much of it was "pleasure?"A U.S. Marine Colonel was about to start the morning briefing to his staff.
- The conductor comes up with an unusual planA businessman rushed into the train station just in time to catch the Brisbane to Rockhampton Express.
- The detective walks around the scene and writes in his little bookThree baseball fans walk out of a bar.
- The devil lets this man pick his own punishment – not all is what it seems!A lawyer dies and goes to hell…
- The doctor handed the father-to-be a lanternDeep in the back woods of Letcher County Kentucky,…
- The doctor was stunned to discover thisA doctor and lawyer are talking at a party.
- The Drunk Man Who Thinks He Is JesusA Drunk Man Stumbles Out of A Bar…
- The Egyptian Treasure HuntersThree young friends, seeking a fortune, adventure together to Egypt where a new pyramid has been discovered.
- The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than GermanThe European Commission has just announced an agreement…
- The farmer and the three legged pigA man is leaning on a farm gate, watching the farmer round up some sheep when he realises the farmer isn't using a sheepdog, but a pig.
- The father was distraught when his daughter told him goodbyeA Father put his 3 year old daughter to bed, told her a story and listened to her prayers which ended by her saying,…
- The florist mixes up her order – and they get a real surpriseJenny, the owner of a small company, just moved out of her old office into a more luxurious one.
- The Funny Old Forgetful Couple Go To A DoctorThere was an elderly couple who in their old age…
- The game warden harasses a woman for reading a bookA married couple was out in the country on a holiday.
- The guy can't believe what the doctor suggests!Guy goes to the doctor for a checkup and gets bad news.
- The hillbilly shocks the woman when he does this to herTwo hillbillies walk into a restaurant.
- The housewife was having a very bad terribly awful dayThe worried housewife sprang to the telephone when it rang and listened with relief to the kindly voice in her ear,
- The lady is shocked when her friend tells her thisTwo older southern women recently rekindle a friendship after many, many years.
- The little girl looks at Mummy's "report card"A mother is driving a little girl to her friend’s house for a play date.
- The man buys a round of drinks as his wife just gave birth to typical Texas baby boy weighing 25 poundsA Texan buys a round of drinks for all in the bar because,…
- The Mechanic Asks The Heart SurgeonA mechanic was removing a cylinder head from the motor of a Harley motorcycle…
- The minister cant believe what the other man gotA minister dies and is waiting in line at the Pearly Gates.
- The new priest wasn't aware of the code wordThere was this old priest who got sick of all the people in his parish who kept confessing to adultery.
- The not-so-bright fishermenTwo buddies are fishing, but they haven't caught anything all day.
- The Not So Random Breath TestJust after closing time, a New Jersey police car is slowly rolling past a TGI Friday’s.
- The nun proposes an indecent suggestion to the priestA handsome priest and a young nun are travelling when their car breaks down…
- The old cowboy never expected his barber to say thisAn old cowboy walks into a barbershop…
- The old man didn't flinch when the Devil arrivedA few minutes before the services started, the towns people were sitting in their pews and talking.
- The old man was fishing in a puddle outside the pubThe rain was pouring down outside O'Connor's Irish Pub.
- The old man went to buy a gun, but never expected this to happenYesterday I got my permit to carry a concealed weapon.