Island Laughs The Un-Pirate Chronicles!

A man comes across what seems to be a stranded pirate on a deserted island.

After extending an invitation onto his boat, he decides to inquire about the challenges of piracy with a wooden leg, hook hand, and eye patch.

Curiosity piqued, the man asks, "Is it tougher to plunder ships with that wooden leg, hook hand, and eye patch combo?"

The supposed pirate responds without missing a beat, "Actually, I'm not a pirate."

Perplexed, the man probes further, "No? Then why the wooden leg?"

"I was attempting to swim off the island when a shark decided to make a snack of my leg. I had to improvise, so I fashioned this plank of wood as a replacement."

Undeterred, the man questions, "And the hand?"

"While scouring the island for food, a snake had a taste for my hand. I had to do a bit of on-the-spot surgery, replacing it with this trusty hook."

Slightly bewildered but amused, the man inquires about the eye patch, "Alright, spill the beans on the eye patch."

The "pirate" confesses with a grin, "Seagull poop."

Incredulously, the man reacts, "Seagull poop makes you blind?"

With a heavy sigh, the supposed pirate corrects him,

"No, it was just my first day with the hook."