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Once upon a time, there was a man named Jack with a flair for fermentation, whose wife, an uptight lady named Diane, threatened him with an ultimatum,
“If you return home intoxicated one more time, I’ll pack my bags faster than you can say Jack Daniels!”
Feeling invincible in the company of his work buddies that evening, Jack threw caution to the wind and got royally plastered, celebrating his own personal Oktoberfest.
His work party ended with a regrettable ‘puke showdown’, resulting in him photographing his own ‘vomit coated’ fashion creation.
He sought advice from his savvy sidekick, who said, “Fear not, Captain Tipsy! Here’s a foolproof plan… Tuck this twenty dollar into your pocket and tell Diane, some random drunkard commemorated his sickness by turning your jacket into a modern art masterpiece and offered you cash for laundry.”
Thinking it a brilliant strategy, he stumbled homeward, preparing his Oscar winning performance.
On arrival, Diane’s sharp eyes spotted the Art Deco jacket, raising a storm.
Jack, showing surprising agility for his condition, quickly unveiled his clever story.
“No, sweetheart, you’ve got it wrong. Some boozed artist mistook me for a canvas and paid me twenty bucks for his laundry bill” he declared, holding out the twenty-dollar bill as evidence.
Diane blinked and asked, “Ok, Picasso. Then why do you have two twenties in your hand?”
“Well,” Jack hiccuped, “the other twenty is from the other guy who thought my pants were a Jackson Pollock painting platform!”
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