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Randy staggered home very late after another wild night with his drinking buddies. 🍻
He took off his shoes to avoid waking up his wife, Kathleen. 👠👀
He tiptoed as quietly as he could toward the stairs leading to their upstairs bedroom, but misjudged the bottom step.
As he caught himself by grabbing the banister, his body swung around and he landed heavily on his rump. A whiskey bottle in each back pocket broke, making the landing especially painful. 🥴🪜💥
Managing not to yell, Randy sprang up, pulled down his pants, and looked in the hall mirror to see that his butt cheeks were cut and bleeding. 🍑😖
He managed to quietly find a full box of Band-Aids and began putting a Band-Aid on each spot he saw blood. 🩹🍑🩹
He then hid the now almost empty Band-Aid box and shuffled his way to bed. 😴
In the morning, Randy woke up with searing pain in both his head and butt, and Kathleen staring at him from across the room. 😵💫😡
She said, “You were drunk again last night, weren’t you?”
Randy said, “Why would you say such a mean thing?”
“Well,” Kathleen said, “it could be the open front door, the broken glass at the bottom of the stairs, the drops of blood trailing through the house, your bloodshot eyes, but mostly,”…
“It’s all those Band-Aids stuck on the hall mirror.” 😂🪞🩹
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