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A Man Decides To Leave His Wife – Her Reply Is Priceless


Clipart-jester-hat-17

 

Dear Wife,

Iโ€™m writing you this letter to tell you that Iโ€™m leaving you forever.ย  I’ve been a good man to you for 7 years & I have nothing to show for it.

 

These last 2 weeks have been hell.ย  Your boss called to tell me that you quit your job today & that was the last straw.ย  Last week, you came home & didn’t even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite meal & even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers.

 

You ate in 2 minutes, & went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps.ย  You donโ€™t tell me you love me anymore; you donโ€™t want sex or anything that connects us as husband & wife.

 

Either youโ€™re cheating on me or you donโ€™t love me anymore; whatever the case, Iโ€™m gone.

Your EX-Husband.

P.S. donโ€™t try to find me. Your SISTER & I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!

 


 

Dear Ex-Husband,

Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter.ย  Itโ€™s true you & I have been married for 7 years, although a good man is a far cry from what youโ€™ve been.

 

I watch my soaps so much because they drown out your constant whining & griping.ย  Too bad that didn’t work.

 

I DID notice when you got a haircut last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was โ€˜You look just like a girl!โ€™ Since my mother raised me not to say anything if you canโ€™t say something nice, I didn’t comment.

 

And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7 years ago.

 

About those new silk boxers:ย  I turned away from you because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, & I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed $50 from me that morning.

 

After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could work it out.ย  So when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job & bought us 2 tickets to Jamaica But when I got home you were gone.

 

Everything happens for a reason, I guess.ย  I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted.

 

My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you wonโ€™t get a dime from me.ย  So take care.

 

Signed, Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell & Free!

P.S. I donโ€™t know if I ever told you this, but my sister Carla was born Carl.ย  I hope thatโ€™s not a problem.

๐Ÿ˜‹๐Ÿ˜‹๐Ÿ™ƒ๐Ÿ™‚๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿคฃ


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