Dad enters his sonโ€™s room and notices that something is wrong โ€“ then finds a note that cracks me up

He wrote a note and left it in his room:

Dear Dad,

It is with great regret and sorrow that Iโ€™m writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend Stacy, because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you. Iโ€™ve been finding real passion with Stacy, and she is so nice. However, I knew you would not approve of her because of her piercings, tattoos, and punk clothes. Also, she is so much older than me.

But itโ€™s not only the passion, Dad. Sheโ€™s pregnant. Stacy said that we will be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children.

Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesnโ€™t really hurt anyone. Weโ€™ll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with other people in the commune for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want.

In the meantime, weโ€™ll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS, so Stacy can get better. She sure deserves it!

Donโ€™t worry, Dad. Iโ€™m 15, and I know how to take care of myself. Someday, Iโ€™m sure weโ€™ll be back to visit, so you can get to know your many grandchildren.


P.S. Dad, none of the above is true. Iโ€™m over at Jasonโ€™s house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than the school report thatโ€™s on the kitchen table. Call when itโ€™s safe for me to come home!

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